Marriage can be blissful. It can also be stressful.

Balancing the responsibilities of family and careers coupled with finding time to manage emotions as well as money is a lot to handle. Regardless of good intentions, the reality is that many couples realize their glaring differences of opinions on handling everything from raising children to saving money can put a strain on the relationship.

The bad news is more than half of marriages end in divorce because of money differences. The good news is your marriage won’t have to feel the financial strain when you steer clear of the five most common money myths that can cause big problems in your marriage.

1. I Don’t Need To Manage The Money, My Spouse Takes Care Of It- You might want to rethink that. Being blissfully ignorant about your family’s financial situation is not only harmful to your budget, but could leave you devastated in more ways than one in the event of serious illness, divorce or death. It is vital to the financial health of the relationship that each partner takes at least some level of responsibility and know what’s going at all times. Plus it keeps one person from being overwhelmed by spreading the workload. If one of you is better with being organized that person can be in charge of opening and filing the bills while the other person pays in them by the due dates.
2. We’re Married Now, All of Our Accounts Should Be Joint- Hold on a minute, before you go co-mingling cash it’s important to step back and determine if that is really the best way for your family finances to be handled. Often anything beyond a common household expenses joint account should be carefully considered and the different spending habits of each spouse should be looked at. Having a credit card solely in your name could allow you to continue building a solid credit score and ensure that in the case of an emergency or divorce you have other financial options.
3. It’s No Big Deal To Keep Minor Purchases Secret - 98 percent of the truth is a lie. Pretending that you’ve had that “old” dress forever or pulling the “it was on sale” line could not only negatively affect your budget but it could erode trust in your marriage over time.  I get that no one wants to feel like they have to ask for permission every time they want to spend a little money. So each partner should agree on an amount they can spend for extras and treats without having to answer to the other. This will prevent resentment, hiding purchases and surprise charges on your credit card bills that will surely cause an argument.
4. Faking It to Fit In is Fine - Trying to keep up with the Jonses or the perceived “It” couple is not only silly, but you’re often competing against a false reality. Most people live dangerously above their means and are hoping no one will find out about it. So instead of one-upping your friends on the latest gadget, car or clothes instead focus your energy and money into things that will allow you to secure your financial future rather than spending irresponsibly on some fad.
5. Shame + Blame = Change - That equation is totally wrong. If your spouse has financial habits that drive you crazy, the situation will only worsen if you attempt to attack them or guilt them into changing. This approach comes across as a “scolding parent” and will not lead to positive or lasting change. You will both have to discuss the issue and concerns openly and work together on a solution and plan to modify the behavior.

Having a healthy relationship with your mate and money both take work and dedication. If you commit to keeping the lines of communication open and avoid letting these common myths cause problems in your marriage you can have a better relationship with your honey and your money.

© Sanyika Calloway Boyce, Financial Fitness Coach